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We had the opportunity to catch a showing of The Kids Are All Right last weekend. The film is a winning and telling look at the way families work by writer-director Lisa Cholodenko (High Art, Laurel Canyon). It stars Annette Bening and Julianne Moore as married lesbian mothers Nic and Jules. They have two children, 18-year-old Joni, who is getting ready to leave for college, and 15-year-old Laser, played respectively by Mia Wasikowska (recently of Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland) and Josh Hutcherson (Bridge to Terabithia and Zathura ). Hard-working and driven physician Nic and currently career-less Jules were both impregnated by the same sperm donation and Laser decides he wants to meet his donor dad. He entreats Joni’s help to do so before she goes off for school as legally he’s still too young to make the request. The role of donor dad Paul is played by Mark Ruffalo (Shutter Island, You Can Count on Me). The effect of Paul’s entry into the already established family is the main crux of this astute, sexy and delightful dramedy.

There are so many things that work so well in this movie. First of all, it is cast impeccably. There is not one weak link or false moment among the five leads and all of the performances individually and as parts of the ensemble are highly enjoyable. Bening and Moore give such elegant portrayals to the long time partners and mothers, you simply never see evidence that they are actually working. They have an incredible ability to listen and they are both so beautifully in tune with themselves as performers that they transcend acting to merely being. Their intelligence and experience is such that they are more than confident enough to trust the strength of the marvelous script by Cholodenko and Stuart Blumberg. Their knowing interaction with each other is dead solid perfect. Every audience member who has ever been in a true, adult relationship will recognize every nuance within Nic and Jules. The not so off-handed sly remarks, the communication without speaking. The bald-faced trepidation and anger they both express in having so much of their happiness dependent upon and tied into another person. We all know this couple so well because most of us – straight or gay - have either been them or known them at one time or another.

The remaining members of the ensemble come ready to play as well. Mark Ruffalo’s characterizations normally tend to give off a mild to not-so-mild stoner vibe, as does his Paul here. But it serves him well as the organic restaurant owner who finds himself unexpectedly insinuated into this family. Attractive and easygoing, he's a motorcycle-riding quasi-rebel of slackerdom who is probably more fun to hang out with than to be truly parented by. He injects a shot of cool into this updated yet still straitlaced take on the nuclear unit and his presence not only turns things upside down, but exposes the cracks and imperfections that come part and parcel with any familial entity upon closer examination. His flaws are magnified as well the more time he spends with Jules, Nic and the kids. He comes to notice that his gravitation towards and dalliances with younger women only end up making him look squidgy around the edges and foolish as a result. What Paul does with this realization isn't exactly a shocker, but Ruffalo instills him with such a sweet puckishness that he remains charming throughout.

Australian actress Wasikowska, who did such compelling work on HBO's In Treatment, conveys an ethereal earthiness as Good Girl Joni. Joni aims high but is always well-grounded. The over-achieving valedictorian is a bit of a welcome contradiction. One senses she wouldn't mind breaking free of her perfect straight-A image and be an irresponsible teenager for a little while before she heads off to school. But she's canny enough to know that she's too good to become a cliché. I appreciated the decision to give Joni subtle changes in her character versus the trite, overused, tawdry "let's turn this good girl into a drunken slut" plot device.

Josh Hutcherson's work as Laser is the first indication of real chops I've seen in this young actor and good for him. It's hard enough being a teenager. Try being a young teen male constantly surrounded by strong women with no dominant male figure in sight to offer any sort of balance, much less guidance. Laser's needs and pain are so achingly evident there is real relief when he and Paul find each other.

I really enjoyed TKAAR. Its slice of life quality actually left me wanting to see more of what happens to these five characters. I got the real sense that there is so much more story to tell here. It's peopled with folks you've probably bumped into a million times at Whole Foods. And you probably bumped into them again at the liquor store next door to the Whole Foods. It's a lot more mainstream than Cholodenko's earlier work and probably more accessible, but it is by no means a sellout. It's a story about life and family that thankfully does not wrap everything into a neat little bow at the end because life doesn't really work like that. I read somewhere that Cholodenko herself had been artificially inseminated and her pregnancy actually held up the pre-production of this film. This anecdote properly sums up what this movie is all about. Life and family are not only what happens when we are making other plans. They are what we find and where we are at the end of every day we're given.